Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, but I must resume my position on the prophet Jeremiah's soapbox, so to speak.
WOE to ye, Harold Camping, and your blaspheming tongue! How dare you, in all your frailty and in your most pitiful state, even grasp at such a prophecy as you have? What do you think makes you so different and unique that your "vision" is more valid than the countless others that have preceded yours? The world should have ended several times by now since the fourth century when Christian blow-hards like you gained power. You are no different, and yet you SHAMELESSLY dispense your filth and expect money for it. All the humanity of Christ flies in the face of your absurdity, for the Son of Man expected nothing from his believers except faith and love. And yet, you come as most conniving, self-proclaimed vermin preachers come asking for money for your personal empowerment! Why are the millions not crying aloud unto God over your vast iniquity and godlessness? Perhaps this truly is the End of Days, for lo, we have found the great Scarlet Woman in thee, Mr. Camping. You are a defiler, a harlot, and a harlequin at that. Your work is a joke and your mouth is a tool of Ignorance. Your are greatly fortunate that God is laughing with you in his infinite mercy. But for those of us who you exploit, we resist you, for God shall also exalt the humble and depose the mighty. Yea, you shall perish as they all do, and you shall be forgotten, for dust thou art. May God drown thee in the spirit of repentance, for your sin is masterfully constructed into a monument of swill, and it will truly take a motion of extreme holiness to convert you into rectitude. October 21 shall pass as the rest have; may no one fear the words, musings, or fantasies of such a failed traitor.
Amen.
